Business Cents

Are You Slipping Back into Caveman Brain?

February 24, 2022 By quadcities Leave a Comment

So all that progress we’ve made overcoming common human fears – like speaking in public, flying on a plane or just showing up in person – has taken a hit.

When Governor Doug Ducey addressed more than 500 businesspeople in Northern Arizona last month, the audience heard him talk about progress being made in expanding broadband connectivity along I-40 from Flagstaff to the California border. That’s good news, right? “This critical infrastructure will give more homes fast internet, improve public safety, increase access to education and help more Arizonans get the care they need through telemedicine,” stated the governor.

But, we seem to have forgotten how to function in a professional setting. The governor paused at times in his address, and normally (before the pandemic), that would have cued the crowd to clap. Unfortunately, there was an awkward delayed response, as the audience worked to recall how to react.

Pre-COVID, pleasing news might evoke an explosion of applause or even a standing ovation. But now, we seem to clumsily struggle to scoot out our chairs with napkins and silverware dropping to the floor as we move to an upright position in a show of honor and respect. That’s because we have caveman brain.

Here’s another example. I’ve heard successful businesspeople talk about how they’ve forgotten how to speak in a professional setting. A lot of families and pets are not impressed by an advanced vocabulary, and since that’s who we’ve mostly been speaking with or grunting at during the last two years, our communication skills may have suffered.

Being back together with groups of people is causing many of us to trip over our stress hormones and collectively tumble into caveman brain, like the herd of beasts our ancestors may have chased off a cliff. Think of our primitive brain stem throwing our intelligent cortex over its shoulder like a dead prehistoric animal and taking charge, telling our bodies to fight, freeze or flee when faced with a perceived threat. None of that works in a professional setting. So all that progress we’ve made overcoming common human fears – like speaking in public, flying on a plane or just showing up in person – has taken a hit.

Motivational speaker Mel Robbins says we have to trick our brains when fear creeps in. Before she gives a presentation in front of thousands of modern people, in modern clothes, using modern language, she moves her brain from fear to excitement.

“Fear is something that stops us all,” she says, “but it doesn’t have to. Fear is a physical state in your body that is exactly the same as excitement. Your heart races, you might sweat a little bit, you might feel tightening in your chest, you might feel a pit in your stomach, you have a surge of cortisol. It’s basically the way that your body goes into a hyper-aware state because it’s readying for action.”

So, how do we go from fumbling around with dread and move to smooth, positive anticipation? Mel would want us to change this experience for the simple part of our brains.

I get this, Mel. On a recent flight, I pulled an old trick out of my caveman brain toolkit. On bumpy flights, I used to position the little air fan above my seat directly at my face and create the sensation of wind on a roller coaster. “I like roller coasters,” says my caveman brain, now that we have the wheel and some simple machines. “Therefore, I’m having a good time and not thinking about falling out of the sky in this big heavy metal tube that I’m buckled into.”

She also says we should grab an “anchor thought” to reframe our minds from agitation to excitement. “An anchor thought is something that will anchor you, so that you don’t escalate any situation into a full-blown panic attack or into a situation where you screw things up.”

Mel wants us to make that anchor thought relevant to that scary thing. So, instead of focusing on the turbulence, for example, she wants us to focus on the people we love and the fun things that the flight is taking us to.

Like Mel, I like to nudge my caveman brain past the woolly mammoth event, as if the encounter already happened and I’m on to thinking about something that’s fun for my caveman, not scary, like a primitive roller coaster. QCBN

By Bonnie Stevens, QCBN

Bonnie Stevens is a public relations consultant. She can be reached at bonnie.stevens@gmail.com.

Navigating with Purpose

November 23, 2021 By quadcities Leave a Comment

Through her education business, This Earth, she brings students into her world of adventure and exploration.

Lava Falls Rapid is white-water fierce. It is, by far, the most famous and daunting rapid on the mighty Colorado River in the Grand Canyon. It comes up after a nice calm stretch of laid-back, almost complacent, floating. Most wouldn’t even notice the distant spray and subtle splashing up ahead. But Christa Sadler does. With oars thrusting forward, she remains on high alert, reading the river. Within about half a mile of the falls, the passengers in Christa’s raft also will be on high alert as they hear the thundering roar of a massive churning, thrashing, wild river dropping 15 feet or so across a span of 100 yards in just 20 seconds.

Lava Falls is a Class 10 rapid, the highest rating for rapids under the Grand Canyon’s old classification system. Sure, there’s more intimidating and challenging white water to be found in places like Alaska, says Christa, a seasoned river runner and world explorer who has navigated through Lava Falls at least 90 times since she was 23. But for most people, this is the most formidable natural force they will ever want to face.

Christa, a small woman with a fabulous belly laugh and a full-speed-ahead kind of appetite for adventure, has many titles – archaeologist, paleontologist, geologist, educator – but out here, she is Wonder Woman, a river running superhero, and this is her territory.

Whatever your image of a river runner is, Christa is not that. Don’t be looking for someone who hasn’t seen a hairstylist in eons and wearing a stinky t-shirt, stained and streaked by decades of sun and sweat. Keep moving on down the sandy shore because that would not be her. In fact, she says, “This is where I feel beautiful and strong. I wear my favorite skirts and dresses and jewelry – sometimes three or four bracelets.”

Christa is glowing and having a blast. “I will literally be laughing so hard that I can’t row – not in the rapids, because something bad will happen – but just being on the river,” she said. “This is the real world. This is where I feel most alive. This is my church, my home. I get to spend time in the most extraordinary places in the world and I’m never as happy, connected and fulfilled as when I’m outside. There’s nothing more grounding to me than having my feet on the earth or in the water and being surrounded by something that humans didn’t make.”

And for her, time on the river isn’t just about the big-adrenaline moments. “Part of it to me is that life here is reduced down to its essence,” she explained. “It’s very simple – you’re cold, you’re hungry, you’re exhausted – and when you’re with a group of people, it’s a tribal thing. You take care of each other. Other elements take over and you’re participating on nature’s terms.”

Reinvigorating her boatload of new tribal members, Christa cooks for them and serves them and basically trains them to eat like a river runner. One of her most satisfying and substantial meals is her famous Green Curry. With a mixture of boiled-down coconut milk, tofu, chicken, ginger and peppers, she fortifies five to 30 rafters at a time. “It’s really creamy. I make it for spring and fall trips, not in the summer. It’s warm, spicy and heats you up from the inside out.”

Christa pursues a mission of helping to open the eyes, hearts and minds of river rafting guests to the extraordinary history of our planet and all its creatures. Through her education business, This Earth, she brings students into her world of adventure and exploration. She offers interactive classroom presentations, field trips and lab exercises, and most of all, facilitates discovery.

“Kids do a lot better learning about natural sciences when they are outdoors,” she said. “It makes more sense to everyone. And I love teaching them about fossils,” she added.

Common fossils found at the South Rim are brachiopods, shellfish that are a distant relative of modern-day clams. They lived 270-million years ago when a shallow ocean covered the region. “We talk about what kind of environment these creatures lived in,” she said, “the depth and temperature of the water, and how they were filter feeders, eating plankton that were just floating along.”

Unlike those prehistoric organisms, Christa is doing anything but just floating along. Beautiful, strong and in charge, she has found her strength, confidence, passion and purpose among ancient rocks and powerful forces. It is here that she ponders and appreciates that one of the most powerful forces on the planet today is education. She has “adopted” dozens of girls and women that she calls her daughters in places like Haiti, Guatemala and Nicaragua.

“The thing that gives me hope is when I’m actually doing something to make the world more equitable,” she said. “It breaks my heart what people have to go through in other nations. Research reveals that worldwide, countries are better off when they educate the women, but the world still fights that.”

And Christa is fighting back. Through her non-profit organization, One New Education, she has supported young women through secondary and advanced education, where they, too, can find their strength, purpose, power and passion.

As Christa shows us, the natural world, and Lava Falls Rapid in particular, has a lot to teach us about resilience. There are obstacles we need to maneuver around, massive waves and huge holes that we need to pay attention to, and if we get flipped, well, she says, “We’re going to feel like a Raggedy Ann in a washing machine.”

But, as Christa demonstrates, we have everything to say about our own rescue and our own experience. “If you just float along, the journey is going to be harder. If you’re waiting for things to happen to you, it doesn’t always work out as well as you hope. You have to make things happen.” QCBN

By Bonnie Stevens, QCBN

Bonnie Stevens is a public relations consultant. She can be reached at bonnie.stevens@gmail.com.

Grounded in a Calling Received in a Bathtub

October 29, 2021 By quadcities Leave a Comment

Here’s how she describes it: “I was taking a bath and suddenly it came to me. I have to move.”

There’s an old Western romance novel, “Call of the Canyon,” by cowboy author Zane Grey. It is set in Arizona’s Northland in the 1920s, featuring Oak Creek Canyon and the high desert terrain surrounding Flagstaff and Sedona. Stunning, glamorous Carley Burch is the heroine who follows her fiancé from her high-society life back East to the rugged and wild Southwest.

By the way, it was a passage in the book about Carley warming her hands by the fire in Flagstaff’s Hotel Weatherford that inspired hotel owner Henry Taylor to go ripping through the drywall to find the original fireplaces and fueled his passion for renovating the historic Victorian building.

I thought of Grey’s book when I met beautiful, serene Karen Russell during a Saturday afternoon party at her home in Sedona. She had recently moved there, the result of a middle-of-the-night calling that brought her to Oak Creek Canyon and the Red Rock Country. Here’s how she describes it: “I was taking a bath and suddenly it came to me. I have to move.”

Karen lived in a little town in Ohio at the time. She was a nutritionist and health coach at the local hospital and would teach, “you are what you eat,” but she had a difficult time setting the example. “I couldn’t find organic food. It was hard to eat out and find healthy meals,” she said.

Karen felt like a Martian in her circle of friends. “I don’t eat pizza and drink beer, so I’d feel like an outcast. The last vacation we took together, I was the only person in the group trying to buy healthier food. They laughed at me.”

Trying to fit in was making her sick. Literally. She endured painful flare ups from fibromyalgia. The auto-immune disease caused her to feel tired and achy. Her neck would become so stiff and sore that she needed a massage twice a month for years. She also was suffering from adrenal fatigue, which she says was caused by chronic insomnia that was weakening her immune system.

“I knew that inflammation was at the root of all disease, caused by gluten and processed sugar. Many people don’t connect the dots between how they are feeling and what they are eating. I knew I had to get rid of the chemicals and get moving.”

She says her gut was trying to tell her what to do. “I was afraid to leave. I had stuffed my feelings down so far, that after a while, you can’t even feel what your gut is telling you.”

And that was Karen less than a decade ago, her body and spirit sinking into her bathtub. And then she received her own Call of the Canyon. “I’d only been to Sedona once,” she said. But it didn’t matter. She got out of the tub and booked a flight. “As soon as I got here, I felt like I was home.”

For Karen, this was highly unusual behavior. She didn’t know if she could financially survive moving away from everyone and everything she knew, but she also knew, “I couldn’t stay there one minute longer.”

To strengthen herself, she drew on words she heard in the health coaching school she attended in New York. “Leap and the net will appear.” To punctuate this phrase, her instructor had taken the class to a flying trapeze gym. “We had to do it to get the point. It was about leaping and knowing you’ll be safe. But if you don’t take that leap, then you’re stuck.”

Her leap landed her “right in the middle of nature,” as she describes living in Sedona and the Red Rocks. She found that encouraging people and ideas began showing up right away, and so did dragonflies. “All these dragonflies were here, landing on me, on my arms, on my legs, they were everywhere. Coming from Ohio, I didn’t know anything about dragonflies.”

She did some research and learned that dragonflies symbolize change. “That was kind of my ‘Sedona Moment,’” she said, of the place that is often known for its vortexes, crystals and mystical energy.

With or without dragonflies, I believe when you start following your heart and your gut, doors open, opportunities appear and an undeniable creative force blows into your life like a desert dust storm. Karen’s might have been elevated to a haboob. That gritty wall of intention demanded that she start baking. And, boy, did she. “This recipe had to come out!” she explained.

She started making dozens and dozens of gluten-free, sugar-free chocolate chip cookies. She put them in baggies, tied a bow around them and added a Karen’s Gluten-Free Living label that included the ingredients for her Chocolate Chip D-Lites. She sold them at farmers markets and in local health food stores. She focused on health coaching and nutrition counseling and began conducting cooking classes in her home and at the community college. She hired a business coach and discovered good things began happening quickly.

“When you’re living your purpose, things go faster,” said Karen. “It could be the energy here, or the open-minded, like-minded people in Sedona. It could be the healthy living, the healthy eating, the hiking, the spirituality that I feel in nature and understanding that there is something out there bigger than us. Sedona helped me with that.”

Eight years since her bathtub revelation, she opened Karen’s Gluten Free Bakeshop in Sedona. “I’m still helping people get healthier, but I would never have known I’d be doing this. I would not be owning and operating a health-food bakery if I were still in that small town in Ohio.”

The baked goods she sells are often inspired by and named for land formations in the area, including the Chocolate Diablo Cookies, made with dark chocolate, cayenne pepper and ginger. “They are like happiness in your mouth,” she said. And Red Rock Energy Bites, a mix of almond flour, maple syrup and beet root. But her most important ingredient, she says, is love. “How you feel when you’re making the food goes into the food. If you’re calm and happy, that transfers over.”

And that’s exactly how I met Karen: calm, happy, introducing others to delicious – yes, delicious – gluten-free, dairy-free, sugar-free, non-GMO food, and living a life surrounded by nature.

Her favorite hiking trail is Devil’s Bridge, a four-mile round-trip path that rewards the visitor with a spectacular sandstone arch – the largest in Sedona. Once you get to the bridge, It’s a great stopping point to find a shady spot and enjoy a snack. Karen recommends the Chocolate Chip Quinoa cookie. “When you’re hiking,” she said, “you want to keep higher protein in mind. This cookie is packed with protein – nuts, chia seeds, quinoa flour and almond flour. I would eat one of these and feel really good.”

Her Red Rock Energy Bites are a great choice, too. Plus, they come packaged in a little bag and are hardy enough to hold their shape, even in a backpack!

For perhaps the first time, Karen feels grounded, energized and healthy now that she’s found her “home” in Sedona. “If we love people and love what we’re doing and really try to live in integrity in our purpose, that is really what we’re here for.”

And, oh yeah, she hasn’t experienced any sign of fibromyalgia since she arrived. “To be in gratitude with where you’re at and what you’re doing and what you have, I think that’s the best way to stay grounded. You realize how lucky you are and how grateful you can be for what you have.” QCBN

By Bonnie Stevens

Bonnie Stevens is a public relations consultant. She can be reached at bonnie.stevens@gmail.com.

Five Pounds to Perfect

August 28, 2021 By quadcities Leave a Comment

If you just, if you only, if you could, what would it be? What’s keeping you from living your best life?

Do you ever hear yourself starting sentences with, “If only,” or “When I,” or “After I?” They sound like this: “If only I had a doctoral degree, I could get the job I really want,” or “After I make my first million, I can travel to exotic lands,” or “When I lose five pounds, I’ll reward myself with a beach vacation!”

These sentence starters sort of sound like goal setters, but don’t be fooled. They can really be tricky little non-starters. Five pounds may as well be 500 pounds, because, in our minds, they are out-weighing the odds that we’re ever going to get there. They are fantasized versions of what a better me or you could achieve, acquire and attract. And they are keeping us from thinking that we qualify for something better than we already have.

When we say these words, we are declaring to everyone, the universe, too, that we’re “not enough” right now, and may well never be. Therefore, we don’t deserve this better life…yet. The worst part is that we’re telling ourselves this and we may actually be listening. These “If only’s, “When I’s,” and “After I’s” are nothing but big uninspiring blobs that are lodged between the life we are living and the life we really want. And that keeps us firmly planted in some kind of weird blob purgatory where we’re not really living yet. So let’s do some blob busting.

“Most people, unconsciously, dream themselves out of their goals,” says Abundance Now author Lisa Nichols. “They dream so far past their current reality or what’s currently possible that they end up abandoning their goals and damaging their own self esteem. They are chasing the macro-win all the time and they’re not looking at all the micro-wins that they can feel really good about to get them to that macro-win. Micro-wins lead to macro-wins.”

The problem with only being focused on the macro-win is that we’re putting our life on hold. We’re actually dismissing the present as real life as we obsess over some massive goal. And we’re also depleting ourselves by not celebrating the little successes, which is a way of punishing ourselves for not having the discipline, strength and intelligence to figure out how to lose those pesky five pounds, take those online classes or work smarter, not harder. Ouch. Those blobs are not only in our way, they’re causing us pain!

I remember reading that Oprah would know that she had “made it” when she could afford a big, luxurious bathtub. I think about the people I know who do own big, luxurious bathtubs. Do you know how often they actually soak in them, with bubbles up to the ceiling, a glass of champagne in one hand and a great novel in the other? I don’t actually either, because that would creepy, but I’m guessing they don’t use these big soakers very often. I do, however, hear people complain that these massive bathtubs take up too much space, require too much hot water, and anyway, who has the time to bask in this kind of frivolous behavior, anyway?

But that’s ok, Oprah, because that was a tangible marker for you. More importantly, I hope you celebrated like a blissed-out mermaid, because that’s what really counts – taking a moment to congratulate ourselves for reaching an important goal. So, can we please have more bubbly celebrations? Lisa Nichols says we most certainly can by creating more micro-wins.

As Lisa describes, micro-wins offer a taste of that thing we want more of. If you want to go to Paris to see the Louvre, Lisa suggests visiting your local museums now, while you’re saving money for Gay Paree!

Leadership Coach Ronda Beaman has mastered the micro-win. Ronda travels the world teaching leadership skills to top-flight executives. Before this, she was raising two boys as a single mom, working full-time and taking classes on nights and weekends toward advanced degrees. She would have liked to have put her boys on a plane and show them the world, expand their horizons and have some fun together, but that wasn’t in the budget, yet. So she created some micro-wins.

As she explained it to me, she would have Italy Night, Morocco Night or Japan Night, for example. The three of them would research the selected country – through encyclopedias, not the internet then – decorate themselves and their kitchen table in honor of the celebrated culture, and prepare the cuisine of the selected nation of the night. At dinner, they might sip miso soup, roll sticky rice in nori, and discuss what they had “seen” that day when they climbed Mount Fuji.

These globetrotting events became much-anticipated mini-vacations for the family. And no doubt, the boys got to experience the world through books, their imaginations and their taste buds. My jaw dropped when I heard about the innovative, educational, family fun and togetherness these people were having on a budget right down the street from me! Guess who else’s jaw dropped? USA Today! Yup, the newspaper proclaimed them “America’s Most Creative Family.” Are you kidding me? Turning hot dogs into racecars with toothpicks and cardboard wheels at my dinner table wasn’t creative enough?

Today, Beaman is the hugely successful executive coach and chief creative officer for PEAK Learning, a leadership firm based in Arroyo Grande, California. She is the first recipient of the “Art of Teaching” award and has been “Professor of the Year” at three universities, including Northern Arizona University. In her spare time, she’s written bestselling books and was named 2018 Fitness Idol! And, she can now actually fly her family to Japan or Timbuktu if she wants.

If you just, if you only, if you could, what would it be? What’s keeping you from living your best life? What micro-wins can you have and celebrate now? Go ahead, I see you there in your toga with a handful of legumes. Write them down on your scroll during your Ancient Rome Night and consider this a double micro-win! Because really, no one will notice those five pounds under a toga anyway. QCBN

By Bonnie Stevens, QCBN

Bonnie Stevens is a public relations consultant. She can be reached at bonnie.stevens@gmail.com.

Hissing is Never a Good Sound

August 3, 2021 By quadcities Leave a Comment

If your home or work environment is crawling with those who continuously hiss at you, you are living your life in a slithery, dangerous snake pit.

I once had dinner with a rattlesnake. It was an uninvited guest, but nonetheless, it showed up at suppertime while I was grilling. I did what any courageous Arizonan should do who doesn’t have a long-handled shovel or a pair of snake tongs. I called the fire department – which I’ve heard is the No. 1 reason people make emergency calls to Scottsdale firefighters. I’ve also heard it’s the No. 1 call they hate.

Knowing this, I called anyway. The dispatcher explained that this particular evening was very busy with bad car accidents and could I “watch” the snake until they could get there. Oddly, I said, “Ok” and sat down on my outside patio furniture and enjoyed my medium-rare filet mignon about seven feet away from the snake (I hear they can lunge six feet).

The rattler held its ground, hissing and taunting me with its flickering tongue the entire time it took me to eat the steak that melted in my mouth like butter and the baked potato that actually was mostly butter. As I sipped my red wine holding steady eye contact with the snake, it continued to hiss. The standoff lasted an hour and 15 minutes!

The funny thing about chewing and sipping this long with the music of a hissing rattlesnake playing in the background is that you get used to it. And that’s my point.

If you have people in your life who are constantly hissing insults and threatening punishment at you, it becomes background noise. But make no mistake – it’s anything but harmless. Hearing this kind of nonsense on replay is insidious and seriously damaging to your well-being.

But don’t just take my word for it, I’m sure I’m not the only woman who’s ever dined with a snake. Give a listen to what Pastor Joel Osteen offers as a prayer for those of us who do this, “Help me to develop relationships with the right people and to separate from those who keep me in the pits.” Not a bad mantra, Joel.

If your home or work environment is crawling with those who continuously hiss at you, you are living your life in a slithery, dangerous snake pit. And make no mistake, the view is no good here and you need to relocate. When you listen to this kind of noise long enough, it becomes your normal playlist. It gets into your head and you start believing all the negative statements being said about you. Seriously, seven feet away is not far enough!

If we want to be at our best, we need to pay attention to what we’re listening to. If it’s not encouraging us or helping us be better versions of ourselves, we need to move out of this barren landscape of negativity. Nothing good can grow here.

Joel says you need some friends who won’t let you stay down. “When you’re in the pits, when you can’t get up on your own, you don’t need people who feel sorry for you. You need people who pull you out of that pit. You need people who love you so much they won’t let you make excuses or stay discouraged or give up on your dream.”

Wow, Joel. No pity party in the pit for us! We need to find people who will push us to be our best selves and not accept our sad excuses. Do not agree to sit there and listen to the hissing, even if the meal is amazing. QCBN

By Bonnie Stevens, FBN

Bonnie Stevens is a public relations consultant. She can be reached at bonnie.stevens@gmail.com.

Life’s ‘Best Used By’ Date is Now

June 26, 2021 By quadcities Leave a Comment

“Because I can no longer ignore death,” she said, “I pay more attention to life.”

Humans are creative and resourceful, but sometimes it takes a transformative event to get us motivated.

In the new movie “Grace and Grit,” featured at the Sedona International Film Festival, filmmaker Sebastian Siegel and spirituality guru and former U.S. presidential candidate Marianne Williamson visited Sedona to discuss how deeply focused people can become when death is staring them down.

The movie is an adaptation from Ken Wilber’s book with the same name. His wife, Treya Killam Wilber, was diagnosed with cancer 10 days after they were married. Their honeymoon was spent in the hospital.

Sebastian said he wanted to capture the “urgency to love” that spoke to him so loudly in the book. “We all have to confront our mortality at some juncture or other. And I think any great love story, whether it’s Titanic or Grace and Grit or Love Story or Romeo and Juliet, the confrontation of that mortality and the recognition that we only have an instant left sometimes gives us the courage to appreciate life more deeply.”

Marianne has worked with many people who have been diagnosed with life-challenging illnesses. “One of the things I’ve seen repeatedly is that in the first five minutes, you just drop so many layers of seemingly meaningless preoccupations and things get very real and very exquisitely noble and intelligent very quickly. One of the things I thought about Ken and Treya, on one hand, the tragedy of the story is that she died; on the other hand, the profound love of the story was brought to the fore because she was dying.”

Mena Suvari plays Treya in the film, but Sebastian chose to let the audience hear Treya in her own words. “Because I can no longer ignore death,” she said, “I pay more attention to life.”

Sebastian wants audiences to “experience” the story of a passionate, romantic, selfless, courageous and transcendent love. He recognizes this “as a reference point for what’s possible in love, for what’s possible for us, how we can transform and become more for each other and through each other.”

In “A Course in Miracles,” Marianne Williamson discusses love and fear. In stressful times, it’s so easy to go the way of fear, but that’s exactly when Marianne suggests we escort fear right out the door. “As we change our thoughts, we can change our world. In the realm of thought, there are two main categories: thoughts of love and thoughts of fear. Every single moment, we choose between the two. If I think with love, then I am more likely to behave lovingly and to attract love from others,” she writes.

What Marianne has been telling us for years and what Sebastian demonstrates in the movie is that we have great capacity to be more present and give of ourselves more completely to things that matter.

COVID-19 has shown us this as well. Life is precious, time is precious. If we live aware of the beautiful gift of time and life, which comes with an expiration date, we may find its “best used by” date is now. QCBN

By Bonnie Stevens, QCBN

Bonnie Stevens is a public relations consultant. She can be reached at bonnie.stevens@gmail.com.

Reflecting the Glow of a Lucky Starfish

May 4, 2021 By quadcities Leave a Comment

The trick to making a difference is recognizing the starfish, in whatever form it shows up.

There’s a popular story told by many a motivational speaker that describes a person walking along a beach who was picking up starfish on the shore and tossing them back into the ocean. An observer told the starfish thrower that his efforts were basically pointless because there were so many starfish on that stretch of sand, so he couldn’t possibly save them all and what he was doing was not going to make a difference. Unphased by the discouraging comments, the starfish thrower kept walking along. He picked up another starfish and sent it back to the sea. “Well, I certainly made a difference to that starfish,” he said, as he continued on.

We’ve all heard stories about a lucky starfish and how a life was changed for the better because of someone lending a kind hand. In business and in life, we want to be starfish throwers because, yes, it means we are helping someone in need, but also, just as important, we’re helping ourselves be the kind of people we want to be. Helping others – especially those who can’t possibly pay us back or return the favor – makes us feel good. And the power of feeling good in a time of mental health crisis cannot be understated. When we feel good about ourselves, we may stand up a little straighter, smile a little broader and, I believe, be better at everything we do, including being kinder to each other. The trick to making a difference is recognizing the starfish, in whatever form it shows up.

That was made extraordinarily easy for me when a young woman with a huge smile was walking my way in a community college hallway years ago. I have to say, she glowed as she greeted me, a stranger.

I didn’t stop to find out who she was then, but I saw her again and again. Finally, we spoke, and I learned she was from Vietnam. She bubbled with an overabundance of joy and extreme gratitude. She believed she was blessed. She recognized she was one of the fortunate few in the world who had the opportunity to earn an education. She was working on her studies while also holding down a job and mastering the English language. And, she had lofty dreams, I thought. She was determined to be a pharmacist in the United States because she wanted to help people heal.

We would visit now and then, and I’d learn about academic awards she had won and scholarships she had obtained. With each achievement she seemed to be bursting with this rare raw joy, and I began to also really truly believe in her vision. It made me wonder how I could support her journey.

I had heard about women in a service club who were taking business clothes out of their own closets and giving them to young women who were about to enter the workforce. I remembered how challenging it was to dress “like the job you want” for countless interviews after graduating from college.

In my own closet hung a silky, yet structured, black and white dress with a delicate jacket that had a faint pattern of tiny seashells. I had worn it once to a business luncheon. I loved the way it felt, the way it looked and the way it flowed with simple elegance. Part of me protested, “But, I love this dress!” The other part said, “Perfect.” And when I gave it to her, she glowed yet again.

Although I’ve heard the story of the starfish thrower many times since, she was the one who first told it to me. She believed that she was that lucky starfish.

As I reflect on that time, I do so with joy, as I remember her beautiful smiling face, and with gratitude because she taught me how to be a starfish thrower.

Coincidentally, her name was “Star.” QCBN

By Bonnie Stevens

Bonnie Stevens is a public relations consultant. She can be reached at bonnie.stevens@gmail.com.

Mental Toughness Finds a Way Out of the Jungle

February 25, 2021 By quadcities Leave a Comment

For 17 days, she ate leaves and berries and slept in dens made by wild boars.

If Maui were a woman, she would look like Amanda Eller. At a lean 5’7 and donning a long, breezy, tangerine-colored dress, Amanda seemed to float, not walk, down the main street of Makawao. Her delicate golden leaf earrings dangled and shimmered against her long smooth, shiny, dark brown hair. Tan, fit and self-assured, Amanda is a calm, poised vision of tropical health. If there is such a thing as an old soul, that would be Amanda, wise, yet youthful. From my perspective, she is the human essence of the Aloha Spirit, embodying the island’s gentleness, beauty and strength.

Not surprisingly, Amanda is a healer. She teaches yoga, practices mindfulness, exercises regularly – hikes, runs, scuba dives, swims – and spends a great deal of time in nature.

As I was locking the bike that my husband and I bought for $100 from a surfer named Chad, I could not help but notice Amanda’s natural elegance as she ascended the stairs next to me. Moments later, I realized she was the doctor of physical therapy that I had pedaled through the upcountry to see. Could this island goddess coax my limping, misaligned, banged-up body into something that moved like hers? I was more than eager to adopt that fantasy.

As I lay on her table and gave her my best self-diagnosis of injured discs, sciatica, torn ligaments and a sprained ankle, she methodically worked on my bruised muscles, misbehaving fascia and screaming trigger points. We talked about Maui as an island that calls to you. We discussed jobs, spirituality and gentle places to ease back into an active lifestyle: like hiking the Kahakapao Loop at the Makawao Forest Reserve for a short journey into the cool rainforest; and exercising at Baby Beach, a shallow cove protected by reefs from the wild North Shore waves but with such a strong current that you can actually swim in place – and people like to bring their babies there, both human and canine. She also talked about some special waterfalls on the Road to Hana that most visitors don’t know about.

Between outdoor adventures during my stay, I would limp back to Amanda’s office and limp a little less when I left.

Six months later and back in Arizona, I was half-listening to the morning news when I heard the words “Maui,” “yoga instructor” and “missing.” With a sick knot forming in my stomach, I looked to the television screen to see Amanda’s serene image, with the same delicate golden leaf earrings. I learned her car was at a trailhead, her keys were stashed under one of the tires and Amanda was nowhere to be found.

Extraordinary search efforts were organized, first by the state and later extended by her friends and family. Funds were raised, vigils were held, helicopter pilots flew and search dogs aided ground efforts. But still, no sign of Amanda. Upon immediately reaching out to her yoga community, one of her friends told me she was the strongest person she knew, “physically and spiritually.” Totally believable.

In the long days ahead, I couldn’t stop obsessing about where she could be. My constant concern crept into my dreams where I felt as though I was running through the thick Maui jungle passing broad giant leaves that seemed to be deliberately positioned to catch raindrops. Except when I looked down, those weren’t my legs, they were longer, leaner, darker. If you believe we’re all connected on some level, you’ll understand why I believed Amanda was out there somewhere, swallowed up by the lush vegetation.

Seventeen days after she vanished, a helicopter pilot spotted her, wildly waving from the top of a dangerously tall waterfall. Dehydrated, she cried dry tears of joy when she realized her rescuers had arrived. For 17 days, she ate leaves and berries and slept in dens made by wild boars. She had lost her shoes in a flash flood and dropped at least 20 pounds from her already slender frame. She had set out for a short jog and meditation in the trees on an ordinary Wednesday, her day off, in May with no hat, no sunscreen, no water, no phone. As she ceaselessly worked to find her way back, she had fallen, injured a knee and had raging infections spreading on her shins. In a news conference, Amanda expressed her gratitude to the community that never gave up. She was shocked to learn she had become national news. And many believe finding her alive was a miracle. I would say that miracle had a lot to work with: Amanda’s mental strength.

Mentally strong people:

Solve problems. Amanda knew she needed food, water and shelter. Obtaining those necessities was where her energy went.

Tolerate discomfort. Instead of grieving about the bed she didn’t have, Amanda was grateful to find plants trampled and patted down by animals where she could rest.

Accept responsibility and learn from their mistakes. Amanda was the first to acknowledge that she had set off that Saturday morning unprepared and without informing anyone.

Believe in a higher power. There were times when Amanda questioned why she was being put through such anguish, but found comfort in an inner voice that assured her that she was not being punished.

Keep their goals in front of them. Amanda’s goals have long been to offer healing. Even through her ordeal, she thought there might be something she could learn that would help others. She forced herself to think about what benefits could be derived from the experience and pushed her mind beyond her current predicament.

Have a strong network. Amanda was shocked to know how many people were committed to her safe rescue.

Strive for balance. Amanda’s lifestyle choices of exercise, meditation, a healthy diet, attention to rest, a peaceful community and time spent in nature no doubt kept her mind and body strong and provided knowledge about the natural environment, which I believe were critical factors to her survival.

Maintain hope. Mentally tough people don’t allow negative thoughts to overwhelm them or get distracted by pain from the past or worries about the future.

Assert power over what they can control and believe they can influence the outcome. Every day that Amanda was lost, she knew she had a decision to make – keep going or give up. She continued to side with life, even after a discouraging Day 14, when she realized she was invisible to search helicopters flying over her. “As the sun starts to go down, you’re like, ‘Okay another night alone. How am I gonna stay warm? How am I gonna stay alive?’” she said in a news conference shortly after her rescue. “And it was a very loud clear message that I received that said, ‘If you want to say ‘no’ and you want to sit on that rock, you’re gonna die. So, you have a choice to make. You can sit on that rock and you can die, and you can say ‘mercy’ and you can feel pitiful for yourself and play victim, or you can start walking down that waterfall and choose life.’ It was a pivotal time in my life where I had to choose life. Every single step was, ‘I choose life.’”

It has been nearly two years since Amanda was lost in the jungle. She has spent some time away from the island, processing her journey. Today, she is back in Maui, healing others and drawing from a deeper well of wisdom.

“As a ‘side effect’ of my experience in the wilderness, my intuitive abilities popped open. This has allowed me to offer healing at a much deeper level than before by easily honing in and addressing the root of the problem,” she told me. “I also offer Transformational Healing and Empowerment Coaching sessions, which give my clients the opportunity to step into their own intuitive capabilities and wisdom thereby assisting them in navigating life’s challenges.” QCBN

By Bonnie Stevens, QCBN

Bonnie Stevens is a public relations consultant. She can be reached at bonnie.stevens@gmail.com.

Be Camera Ready, Like James Bond

January 28, 2021 By quadcities Leave a Comment

The thing about Opportunity is she doesn’t necessarily arrive after you’ve lost five pounds, gotten out of your sweatpants, whitened your teeth and brushed your hair. Opportunity is quite stubborn about being on her own schedule. She’s kind of a brat that way. She shows up when she feels like it, whether it’s convenient for you or not. That’s why you have to be sneakier than Opportunity. I’ve found the best way to outwit Opportunity is to make a habit of being Camera Ready.

Being Camera Ready means you are at your best. You stay in shape, you have a healthy diet, you’re sensible about sleep, you have an efficient morning routine and you know how to pull yourself together quickly. Being Camera Ready requires a haircut that works and is up-to-date, ready-to-go clothes that fit your lifestyle and size and aren’t hiding behind a jungle of garment nostalgia.

In her book “What Self-Made Millionaires Do That Most People Don’t,” Ann Marie Sabath says millionaires don’t waste time fussing over themselves too much – they stick to a look that works for them, they maintain it, and they can count on it in a hurry.

Being Camera Ready means you are in shape mentally, as well. You are excited to get out of bed, you pay attention to current events, you look forward to engaging with the world and you are anxious to jump into your day. You know who you are and why you do what you do. You have purpose, enthusiasm and intention about moving toward your goals, which you actually have. You are passionate about others and about life, and you show it. You are an eager participant in the world. Your glorious spark is contagious. And the world is delighted to catch your fire. You are ready for Opportunity!

Take Marie Osmond, for instance. I met Marie in a television station lounge just before a noon news program was about to start. She was the featured guest. And, because it was lunchtime (and because I am a journalist), I was eating my usual peanut butter and jelly sandwich. The then-22-year-old Marie was also eating – Kentucky Fried Chicken – with her fingers, over a flimsy paper napkin on her lap. I was horrified. Did Marie not understand that she would be on the air in a matter of moments and the Colonel’s special recipe could be a special recipe for disaster? Is there anything messier? I considered rushing to her side with some damp paper towels and a tiny mirror. What if she got grease on her face, in her hair, on her outfit?

Before I could run to her aid, she got the call that we were in a commercial break and she was at the top of the next news segment. I was stressed out. Marie was not. She swallowed her bite, wiped her hands, discarded the napkin and calmly took her place in the studio with her big, brave Osmond smile. Did she even check her teeth? No! I don’t think she did! That’s because Marie knows she’s Camera Ready. And in that instant, I knew I wanted that same kind of self-assuredness – that sunny, sparkly KFC Confidence when you know you look great, you feel great and you are ready to greet the world, teeth first.

Susan Hyatt knows what I’m saying. She’s all about empowering people to be at their best. As she explains in her book, “Bare,” she brings on the hair extensions and fake eyelashes. She even invested in a pair of spectacular, more-permanent embellishments – I’ll let her tell you about those. Do these things make her a better person? I would argue, yes. Yes, they do!

Much like a knight in days of yore going through his ritual to get his mind in the game, Susan has her own armor, breastplates and all, if you will. She does what makes her feel confident and at her best. I have no doubt Susan could take a bite out of a sticky, stringy, greasy-delicious KFC drumstick on her way to a podium to face a stadium full of people and deliver a rousing self-conscious-free motivational speech! She knows she looks great, which makes her feel great, which makes her super happy and excited about whatever is about to happen next. And when she smiles at us, we smile back at her. Are we looking for chicken in her teeth? No. No, we’re not! We’re taking in her whole perky being.

Being Camera Ready takes preparation, practice and a sincere interest in other people. Why? Because being Camera Ready is all about your involvement in the world around you. You’re curious and paying attention to your environment – the people, situation, scenery, details and yes, Opportunity, because she’s probably there, too. Being Camera Ready creates confidence and is a beautiful way to show respect for yourself and others. It means you have brought your best self to the party and you have shown up to interact.

When you are in the habit of being Camera Ready, it doesn’t take a lot of planning, shopping or effort. And, I can tell you, if you are not Camera Ready, you will miss out. The worst part is you’ve taken yourself out of the action.

As someone who interviews people almost daily, I can tell you it’s a pretty common occurrence that people freeze and back away when suddenly the spotlight is on them. Being Camera Ready means you have a response when Opportunity wants to engage. So, practice – with your thoughts, conversations, attitude, appearance, health and purpose. Volunteer when Opportunity invites participation. Step up, introduce yourself, “look alive,” as my mother would say. Bring on your KFC Confidence. If you don’t think you are interesting, adopt a hobby or an exotic pet, take classes, travel.

I found myself surfing alongside a lifestyle model named Brianne in Maui one sunny morning. She makes money by living her life, her lifestyle, on camera. Wet or dry, she brings her Osmond smile and fearless composure. And, click. She’s in a magazine, enjoying her life, earning a living. Everything about her beams with the joy of who she is and what she’s doing. And, that’s attractive. She lives Camera Ready.

Join me in this pre-COVID exercise. Let’s make you the surfer. You’re having a playdate with the Sea and the Sea wants to roughhouse. You’re getting “maytagged” – a term kayakers use when they’ve been thrashed around by a body of water as if they were in a washing machine. So, after hours of this, you may be a little scraped up from being rolled and dragged across the sandy, rocky ocean bottom and your eyes feel like they are floating in little buckets of saltwater. But, you have been living in the moment and are ecstatically happy. You switch out of your swimsuit and into whatever is in your car – which is probably the most beat-up pair of cut-offs you didn’t know you owned and a faded, stretched-out shirt given to you at a Padres game when you were 16. Why do you keep these old clothes? No one knows. Did you bother combing your hair, or applying some lotion or even Chapstick? Nope.

And now, you’re hungry. You are going into a lively restaurant where there are many humans and if you thought about it, you might realize you would not even chance taking out the garbage or walking to your mailbox looking like this. But here you are, dressed in rags, sunburned and surf-rashed with swollen eyes and wild hair.

The place is soooo crowded. And you feel soooo fortunate to get one of the very last tables. As you walk all the way through the restaurant, past the stage with the ukulele player and his hula-dancing wife, you notice how everyone else actually did comb their hair and put on real clothes. You may begin to feel a little uncomfortable. Could you look worse? Probably not. Do you want to engage in a conversation with a stranger like this? Did you bring your outgoing self, ready to sing along in “Somewhere Over the Rainbow” and jump in with your own hula moves? I’m thinking not. So, you find your chair, avoid all eye contact and focus on a spot on the exit door to stare at. Yes. Good idea. Let’s take the food to go and exit.

And that’s exactly when Opportunity shows up. Before you can say “Remington Steele,” the exit door opens and you lock eyes with – wait for it – Pierce Brosnan, in all his smiling, 6-foot-1, Irish movie-star handsomeness. And, guess what? He looks better in person than he does in “Mamma Mia!” He is the epitome of Camera Ready. You also notice, there is only one table left in this family restaurant and it’s within a scrunched-up arm’s reach of you. Yup. And that’s where the Tiki Man Pizza wait staff is delivering James Bond. Now, consider what you would give to be Camera Ready at this moment.

If you think this cannot happen, I’m here to tell you it happened to me.

In my fantasy world, Pierce and I shook hands as he squeezed his tall, dark self by me into his chair. His wife, Keely Shaye Smith – a journalist and film producer – and I hit it off immediately. We talked about our next projects. And she says, “I need a writer. Are you available?” We had a spirited conversation, huge laughs and made plans to meet up again soon at another local restaurant, with hula dancing.

Sadly, this is not how it went.

Instead, Pierce squeezed by me and I stood up to give him more room. That’s right. I tried to back away from Pierce Brosnan. He shook my hand and in his most charming booming Irish accent, said my name! “You’re a very Bonnie Bonnie!” Keely was kind and wonderfully approachable and James Bond was calling me pretty. I was struggling to look him in the eye. I was shaken and stirred. My posture was begging forgiveness for showing up anywhere looking like this. Pierce and Keely lingered and were thoroughly enjoying the neighborhood hangout. I wanted to bolt.

And, you might say, “Bonnie, give yourself a break. You were surfing all day. Of course you weren’t at your best. So what if you’re scraped up and bruised with out-of-control frizzy hair, bloodshot eyes and draped in the worst possible clothes you own? You were simply caught off guard!” But then I would say, “That’s a great excuse, but it doesn’t change the outcome or the fact that my cutoffs were clinging to me by threads. And, by the way, I have no doubt Brianne back in Maui would have been Camera Ready. So what’s my problem?”

The point is, I believe both Brianne and Marie could have been pummeled all day by waves, scarfed down KFC or Tiki Man Pizza and still have had an engaging, maybe even life-changing conversation with Pierce and Keely, because they understand the importance of being ready – Camera Ready. This, I believe, is why some people seem lucky. Good things happen for them because they show up, ready for Opportunity.

Truly, anything can happen in life because that’s the thing about Opportunity. She loves a surprise and she will bring it. But you have to bring it, too. Know what makes you feel Camera Ready and get to that place. You want to be out there showing off your best moves, you’re I’m-having-so-much-fun-you’ll-want-to-come-hula-with-me attitude and your sunny KFC Confidence.

Trust me, because what’s not fun is slinking away and hiding behind a ukulele player and his hula-dancing wife in a tight space.

Honestly, wouldn’t you rather be having a finger-licking good time with James Bond? QCBN

By Bonnie Stevens, QCBN

Bonnie Stevens is a public relations consultant. She can be reached at bonnie.stevens@gmail.com.

Resiliency in Action: Keeping Calm, Saving Lives

December 31, 2020 By quadcities Leave a Comment

Resiliency is the ability to stand strong through a storm, not buckle beneath the weight of adversity, problem-solve under pressure, remain calm even as others may not and, I would add, maintain integrity through challenging and shifting circumstances. The most admirable examples of resiliency I’ve witnessed include: getting through a tough situation with an awareness and concern for others; exhibiting the self-control and discipline necessary to stay focused on the best possible outcome; and, performing whatever role you are being called upon to take.

History acknowledges resiliency in the aftermath of difficult times, for sure. Those living through it experience resiliency in action through human performance and describe it as heroic.

Dr. Anthony Fauci, director of the National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases and chief medical advisor to President-elect Biden, told NBC News Anchor Savannah Guthrie, “We are going through very, very difficult times.”

I’m reminded of when Arizona and the nation experienced resiliency in action, live on television. I call it, “The Night Phoenix Became a Big City.”

It started just before 5 p.m. on Friday, May 28, 1982, when resiliency was tested inside the KOOL-TV studios. Here’s what happened through the eyes of 10 p.m. News Producer Doug Drew:

I had produced hundreds of newscasts, but for the first time ever, all of a sudden, my lead story was happening right before my eyes. Our 5 p.m. newscast was co-anchored – Mary Jo West reported the news from the newsroom, Bill Close anchored in the large TV studio in our other building across an alley. Only about 50 yards separated the two.

All of a sudden, reporter Sal Quijada burst into the newsroom to say that a man with a gun had gotten into the studio with Bill Close.

It wasn’t long before our television station was filled with police officers with guns, inside and outside. I had to take something to the control room, and when I walked in, I remember the strange scene, police officers shoulder to shoulder with our station management, with the producer, director and other technical staff.

Yet, everyone seemed so calm. That, despite the fact that when I looked into the studio through the glass that separated it from the control room, there was the man with the gun holding Louie Villa, the teleprompter operator, at gunpoint. Louie appeared to have some blood on him.

With a gunman just a few feet away, the mood in the control room, while tense, was serene. There was no yelling, no sense of panic. Everyone seemed to be in total control, from the police to station management, to the producer, director and other technical staff.

And the person who had the right to be the most panicked of all, Bill Close, didn’t seem panicked at all! I watched as he talked in a calm voice to the gunman, to the producers, to the police through a studio phone and eventually to the viewers who would be witnessing the hostage situation as it played out on live TV. I returned to the newsroom and knew for the first time in my life my lead story would be about the very people with whom I worked!

Meanwhile, Anchorwoman Mary Jo West was seated in her usual chair in the newsroom under the bright glow of studio lights awaiting her cue from the floor director to begin the newscast. “I’m sitting there and I hear in my earpiece, ‘You’re going to be anchoring the news alone.’ My first thought is Bill died of a heart attack. He was never sick and never late,” she said.

At about the same time, Production Assistant Nancy Petranka came running into the newsroom, screaming and visibly shaking. We later learn that she had come face-to-face with the armed intruder. She said she started to move away from him, “Then, Louis Villa came towards him and that’s when I made a move to run away,” she told reporter Mike Arra.

In the 1980s, television monitors rimmed the KOOL-TV newsroom. Studio cameras were positioned on Close. Also in the camera frame was Joseph Billie Gwin behind our anchorman holding Villa in a chokehold at gunpoint. Producers, assignment editors, reporters, videographers and writers had a front-row seat to the frightening scene through the monitors of the newsroom.

There was no question the situation was serious. Gwin had already fired one shot in the studio. He had a black bag and we wondered if there were more weapons, a bomb perhaps. We soon learned he brought his own television monitor so he could watch what went out on the air.

“As the news came on, news reporters [from all over the Phoenix area] parked in front of me, sitting very calmly,” said West. “I said to myself, ‘You can do this.’ I pulled out my acting chops, blocked out everything else and told viewers the news of the day.”

The news of the day, as it was broadcast at 5 p.m. from KOOL-TV, did not include the hostage situation. “At the end of the newscast, I ran as fast I could to the bathroom to throw up,” said West, who had been physically pushing herself all week in a police bootcamp for a series called “Women Cops,” which later caught the attention of CBS network management and opened the door for her anchor position in New York.

About 30 minutes into the hostage situation, News Director Bill Miller convened everyone who was working on the 10 p.m. newscast. He announced that roughly half the group would be working on a newscast as usual, without any mention of what was happening inside the studio. The others would cover nothing but the evening’s crisis. In a room full of news reporters, no one argued, no one challenged. Everyone got to work. West stood by, ready to go on the air at any moment.

For the next three-and-a-half hours, stunned, worried, stressed professionals did their jobs. In total, four co-workers were held in the studio; two were released by Gwin early in the evening. All the while, Close talked with the gunman; Villa remained silent and motionless. There was speculation that perhaps Gwin was high on drugs. The 28-year-old’s eyes and focus seemed to shift at times. He was nervous and sweating as his thumb held the hammer of the gun. But Close, who was in contact with a police negotiator in the control room, pretended not to notice. He called his captor “Joe” and talked to him as if he were a guest. He asked the young man about his high school experience and told him he looked like an athlete.

Later, we learned Gwin was mentally ill. Legally, it was determined that he was insane. “Bill allowed Joseph to be seen. He gave him his moment of fame and that made him feel important,” said West. “He kept calm, treated this mentally ill man with respect and gained his trust.”

Through the evening, Close engaged Gwin nonstop and learned that he wanted a statement read live on the air. Close negotiated a deal. He would read the statement in exchange for the gun.

At about 9 p.m., station owner Homer Lane made the decision to break into the popular television program “Falcon Crest” and Anchorman Bill Close, in his trusted news voice, read from the pages that Gwin handed him in a “Special Broadcast.” The rambling 20-minute-or-so manifesto warned of a world war and identified country western singers like Johnny Cash and Tanya Tucker as also aware of what was yet to come. Gwin watched the broadcast on his monitor to make sure he wasn’t being tricked.

Close held up his end of the bargain and so did Gwin, who surrendered his weapon. Again, remaining calm, Close casually, yet deliberately, slid the handgun across the news desk away from Gwin, as if he were brushing paperclips out of the way. Close stood up and shook hands with his captor. That’s when officers entered the studio. With a protective hand on Gwin’s shoulder, Close directed the police to put down their guns.

By all accounts there were many acts of resiliency that night. “I just praise Bill Close to this day,” said West. “That was one of the greatest things he ever did. He saved people’s lives. He was a hero.”

Drew’s account continues like this:

Looking back, there is one thing I remember most of all. Obviously, this was a huge story in Phoenix, and other Phoenix TV stations, radio stations, newspapers and even some national media arrived quickly out in front of our station waiting for word on what was going on inside. I will never forget what happened next. As the situation dragged on, the KOOL-TV station management agreed to let the media into the building that housed our newsroom so they didn’t have to stand outside. And not only did they let the media in, many of them were our own competition, but the KOOL management team also ordered pizzas for them. That’s right! Not only were the other media allowed inside, they were also treated to dinner and drinks. In addition, KOOL-TV brought in an extra TV monitor so the media could watch live what was happening. I can’t understate how incredible that is. In our business, getting the story first, beating your competition was a daily obsession. Yet, here, before my eyes, we were not only cooperating with the rest of the media, we were, in fact, facilitating their efforts, making it easier for them to cover the story! That sticks with me today, how we helped our competition cover this most difficult situation.

Also memorable, as the story dragged on and on, no one panicked. No one ever yelled, there was no running, no sense that one of the nation’s biggest stories was happening in our own house. I saw everyone being civil to each other. I will never forget that part, how such an immense tragedy, such a huge emergency, was taking place right before our eyes, yet everyone seemed under control. And most important of all, I remember how Bill Close’s calm response probably saved lives that night.

As a young assistant producer writing news stories about events other than what I could see on monitors above my desk, I was struck by how quiet, focused and caring everyone was in the newsroom. When I returned to work on Monday morning, there were locks on all doors leading outside and bars on the windows. People escorted each other to their cars, a few parking lots away. An awareness settled in about who was in the building or even lingering nearby. Phoenix, we had to face, had changed, seemingly overnight. It was indeed a big city with big city threats. A television station with workers running back and forth across an alley and flying in and out of unlocked doors would be a thing of the past.

What didn’t change were traits of resiliency that show up like heroes in difficult times. Resilient people:

Maintain a sense of control.

Remain calm.

Are situationally aware.

Focus on problem-solving.

Identify as survivors, not as victims.

Treat others kindly.

Look for the win-win.

Cooperate and step into their role.

Express empathy, soften even, to gain an understanding of others.

COVID-19 is testing our resiliency today. It could well be considered our gunman holding us hostage, threatening to cause harm and calling the shots. We all have a role to play to keep ourselves and others safe. How well we practice and demonstrate resilience will be remembered by today’s young people who will tell their grandchildren what resilience looks like and how heroes behave in a crisis. QCBN

By Bonnie Stevens, QCBN

Bonnie Stevens is a public relations consultant. She can be reached at bonnie.stevens@gmail.com.

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