Once you have decided on some life goals, you need to decide what motivates you.
Focus on Being Your Authentic Self
Take the time to sit down and look at your future goals. You could divide them into short-term and long-term goals. Now, look at the goals and see if they are in alignment with your authentic self. This is the part of you that defines who you are and what your actions and thoughts will be to support your true self. This is not the part of you that attempts to please others at your own expense. It is not about making other people happy at your own expense. Your authentic self is about you, not what you want to project to others. If you are true to who you are, then you can use those thoughts to focus on future goals that are supportive to you!
Look For What Motivates You
Once you have decided on some life goals, you need to decide what motivates you. Think about why you picked the particular goals you have. What drives you toward them? Why are you craving the change in direction in your life? There must be a motivator from the inside, not external, for this to work. It is also important that you understand how you are driven and how to access what drives you.
Let Go of Negative People
The path to obtaining the joy you want does not include room for associating with people who treat you badly or are not a positive support for you. Part of being authentic is having healthy self-respect and in doing that, you protect your personal goals. A way to determine if a friend is negative or not is to observe the way they speak to you. Do they negate your ideas or encourage them? Do they seek out the bad things to talk about or focus on what is good in the world? The biggest test of a relationship is to ask, “How do I feel about me when I am around them?” Once you find the supportive relationships you have, spend more time with them and less time with the “Debbie Downers!”
Look for the Good in Any Situation
As you focus on your life goals, it is important to reduce the non-supportive thoughts and actions. Don’t allow yourself to become trapped in the old habit of whining about how things should be. Look for another point of view or perspective and then focus on that. You don’t have to be a Pollyanna; you are simply putting your thought time into what works for your life. It took time to create the life you have, so it stands to reason it will take time to create your new life goals. When they say, “Life is a journey, not a destination,” this simply means the day-to-day stuff is important. Step over the thoughts that bring you down and replace them with the stuff you want to move toward.
What If Other People Don’t Like My Goals?
This can be a huge brick wall for all of us. We are so excited that we finally decided to live authentically and have set goals for ourselves and want to tell the world!
Be careful here. Don’t try to talk other people into accepting your goals. These are your private goals and you are asking for trouble if you advertise them to your friends and family. They will probably want you to stay the way you are. This process is private, something you are living toward. You may take a class or look for a new job or start a savings account, all with the intent of aiming your activities toward your dreams or life goals. It is rare to be able to announce to everyone what you intend to do and have global support.
Create Supportive Relationships
Relationships come in all sizes and shapes. It is important to focus on proper communication with the individuals you feel make your life fuller and more joyful. You must learn to listen to what others are saying and allow them to have their own path. Be flexible with others as long as there is respect at the core. Offer support when it is asked for as long as it is comfortable for you and fits into your life-goal path. You can do this! QCBN
By Karon Lynn, Au.D.
Trinity Hearing Center is located at 1330 N. Rim Dr., Suite B in Flagstaff. For more information, visit Trinityhearing.net.
Karon Lynn, Au.D., is a doctor of audiology with 30 years of experience working with hearing impaired individuals. Dr. Lynn may be reached at 928-522-0500 or at audio@trinityhearing.net.
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